Forgiving Yourself

We all have days that we sit down, blaming ourselves, going over the decisions that we have made in our lives that have brought us to this moment.  Wondering why we keep making the same mistakes, experiencing feelings of hopelessness or doubt and why we are not where we thought we would be in life.  What I’ve come to realize is that we spend a lot of time reliving our pasts hoping to find the answer to the million dollar question; “Why did I do that?”

Give yourself grace, forgive yourself and free yourself.  Forgiving yourself may seem like an impossible task, but by holding in that guilt, shame or resentment we are only punishing ourselves.  We may have a legitimate reason why we feel like we have to hold on.  Most of us have regrets, things left unsaid or buried deep inside, but without forgiveness, the past will always find a way into our present and if we are not careful our future.    

REALITY CHECK.   When I visit my Mom’s graveyard and look around at all the people with tombstones I wonder how many died with heavy hearts or burdened minds, never reaching their full potential. Holding back from fulfilling their life’s purpose, creating healthy, lasting relationships or a combination of both.   Despite the sadness, it also motivates me to forgive myself, to move on and get past my past.  You can’t live the life you want and feel light in your heart, unless you take the opportunity to look in the mirror and tell yourself out loud “I forgive myself.” When is the last time you got real, got deep and took a good, long look in the mirror?  Have you ever wrote out a description of the man you want to be and compared it the man you are?  Have you took it to the next level and wrote down what you need to forgive yourself for so that you can begin living the life you were meant to have?

When you finish reading this, sit and think; what can I do to forgive myself?”  You may feel vulnerable and weak, but that is exactly the place you need to be to begin to look up and let go.  I cheated. I was in jail.  I lost my job.  I hurt a lot of people.  I have lied.  Forgive yourself.   Please don’t take it lightly, society, your friends maybe even your family, may be comfortable living with a certain amount of guilt, it may even feel “normal”.  So even if you choose to forgive others first….be sure to make time to for your own forgiveness and recognize that it’s never too late to start.  I had a revelation while writing this blog and it was that; forgiveness is a choice and death is certain.  So how will you live out the rest of your life?

Forgive yourself for your faults and your mistakes and move on.  – Les Brown

“In order to heal we must first forgive… and sometimes the person we must forgive is ourselves.” - Mila Bron